See what love did to us.
We embraced the word but not its meaning and let it take charge of our emotions and humanity.
We sought to maintain the status quo against all odds,
and we got blinded to the hurt we were sowing.
Love, it became an answer to all the questions I asked you.
Love, it became an explanation for the things you did wrong.
For every walk, fall, or jump off the cliff,
all you had to do was create a sentence and throw it right in.
Whole statements with missing intentions.
How gullible can love make me feel?
The distance was going to tear us apart, it was obvious but your defence was,
“you’d let me go if you love me.”
You saw me hurting from the lies you told but
the simplest apology was replaced with an incontestable
“I love you baby.”
“If you love me, you’d do it for me.”
That’s one for every time you made me do what you know I hate to do.
You made love a blackmail tool.
You didn’t even notice it anymore when I was sad,
you just assumed that happiness came with loving you alone.
Other days you used that word on me because you thought that’s what I want to hear,
didn’t bother you to know what I needed to tell you.
Then comes the time I really would love to hear you whisper you love me but all you yell is,
“faster. Don’t cum yet. Touch my nipple. Hold my waist.”
You substitute making love for having just sex.
The last time we were with our friends, not in one moment did it occur to you to use it.
Made me wonder if it was no longer your favourite word.
Even when I said it, you simply whispered, “thank you, babes.”
On our trip to your favourite vacation spot, you said it a million times over,
“I love you for this babe.”
What if I didn’t do this?
When I got you the Gucci bag you desired, “you texted it to me that night.”
You forgot my birthday but that’s okay because you love me.
It didn’t matter that we were drifting apart emotionally because you love me.
Days I was scared of telling you about my mistakes because
you’d rather tell me you love me instead of listening to me.
I got used to listening to it than feeling it, it no longer held any value.
How can you say you love me, yet not see past my face? Not feel my grief?
Why should you claim to love me when all there’s to us
is nothing but staying busy in a relationship?
Was it still love when you judged me without hearing my side of the story?
Your facebook relationship status was updated last night, complicated.
I think I am beginning to understand what you mean by love.
Or perhaps I’m mistaken.
Love for you is just a facade to pass time, yeah?
Was this the plan all along or did you genuinely fall in love with me?
I hate how many times I have to use this word.
Oh, I fell in love with you,
now it seems like you didn’t catch me, it was just a trap.
Am I mistaken?
What happens now?
With all the choices I made and decisions I didn’t make because I love you.
The biggest joke this morning was asking me to let you be yet saying you love me.
I am confused!
With you, I have learned, that it is better to feel love than hear it.
My newest revelation is that love takes more effort than what we give.
The word itself is bigger than its meaning.
Now I know that to love another requires loving myself adequately,
I shouldn’t have left you in charge.
Next time I will ask questions.
If I love again, it won’t be because I fell, it will be because I understand that love is a seed.
A seed you sow in yourself, nurture by expressing it to others,
and harvest with the hope that it bears a good fruit.
With love nothing is promised, you only have what you work for.
Next time I love, I hope to be shown what the word means.
I’m tired of hearing it in a world where it’s the basis for lies, evil and abuses.
See what love did to us…
If you love me, show me, don’t tell me.